When I started my ‘Zany and Zaftig‘ column on this blog it was in response to so many readers requesting that I show more style posts–because there were so few outlets that showed curvy gals’ style. When the other day I decided to create a Pinterest board also celebrating zany and zaftig women, I could never have imagined the sh*t storm that ensued.
The below photo in particular garnered over 230 comments that ranged from “fatty” and “porn” and “fat is not beautiful. Period.” to long, crazy and mean-spirited discussions about obesity, health, anorexia, metabolism, and endless debates over the use of the term “real woman.” I was at once disgusted, fascinated, intrigued and overwhelmed by such passionate responses to (in my opinion) a beautiful size 14-16 woman siting in a peacock chair. I mean seriously.
I pinned these images mostly for the sake of diversity. I believe very much in diversity and that it is diversity itself that is the most beautiful and intriguing. I don’t just pin curvy gals, I don’t just pin black girls, I don’t just pin white girls or skinny gals or girls who look like me. I pin all kinds of ladies–and other stuff–that–for whatever reason, I find to be refreshing and beautiful–inside and/or out.
Many of the comments on this photo saddened me because it became so clear to what degree media has created an atmosphere of self-hatred and a trite ideal of beauty. As I try and work my small corner of the Internet to work against these stereotypes I see how deep in it we all are. I spent a long time debating whether or not to sensor the comments. As the board curator, I have the power to delete comments. And while some of the discussions and comments were so utterly offensive that part of me really wanted to delete–I realized just how much this dialog was necessary–and I left all the comments–the good, bad and ugly–up. I still don’t know if I made the right decision.
The top photo is me. Size 14. Unphotoshopped–with all of my cellulite and my curves (taken before my pregnancy began). My doctor (thank god) has given me a perfect bill of health. Quite frankly, I like me this way, and so does my fiancé. I am not ashamed by my body.
Could I exercise more? Sure. Could I eat healthier? Absolutely. But shouldn’t all of us always be working on ourselves, be it physically, emotionally, spiritually, intellectually or otherwise? I think so.
I also think that while we are all working on ourselves, let’s also try and be a little nicer to ourselves–to each other, and to celebrate diversity in all its shapes, sizes and colors, huh?
Mr. Pickles says
You look lovely! Thank you for standing up for NORMAL sized women of the world! Trust me, your natural beauty shines through!
Anonymous says
Thin people are normal too, and many struggle with weight GAIN! ;) It’s a continuum, not a one point thing or a normal vs. freak…
evasuejane. says
good for you. [:
i agree, we all should work on ourselves as a whole.
i think you’re lovely.
eva.
Toni Deckers says
You look fantastic. Thank you for encouraging us all to be more accepting of others as well as continue to better ourselves.
laura says
Thank you. Pinterest is so hard. There was some photo/quote of Gwyneth Paltrow on Pinterest saying how she works her butt off to get the body she does, and when I tried to comment about how she was also fabulously wealthy, i got responses that insinuated that fat people are lazy, that “it doesn’t cost anything to go running” etc, as if there aren’t economic implications on our bodies (on top of everything else). I almost wish there weren’t comments on pinterest at all, just images!
Justina Blakeney says
Thank you for bringing up the issue of economic implications on our bodies–it’s so true–this is also a class issue.
Anonymous says
Yes, so true.
Faith says
I am totally moved by this post. I am moved by the fact that not only do you have wicked ass taste and a bazzillion quatrillion followers on pinterest – but that you, when it is the call, take a serious stand for what you believe in. Not only that – but in doing so you inspire others, aesthetically and perhaps more importantly- you raise our level of consciousness. Keep standing for what you believe in- it’s elegant, sexy and oh so beautiful – just like you ma sistah :)
ps I think you did the right thing by leaving the comments- this conversation will provide something for everyone in the end.
Justina Blakeney says
awww thanks boo.
Ana Degenaar says
This comment has been removed by the author.
Justina Blakeney says
Ana, I’m glad that you love the post–but I’m hoping to encourage people to spread the love :)
Anonymous says
Ana,
I don’t normally respond to blog comments and what not, but I find your comment frustrating! I feel as though you have no idea as to what eating disorders are all about, so your comment about just eat, is uncalled for. Educate yourself on anorexia and other ED’s and then if you feel you want to comment, by all means, go ahead. I think Justina’s blog is wonderful and all of us women need to learn to appreciate our bodies more! So many people think anorexia or even obesity is a choice, but it’s not! They are illnesses!! Serious illnesses and instead of bashing people, we should be offering support and love, because, unless you have experienced an illness such as these, we all have no idea what those individuals are going through! Justina, thanks for being a voice to all of us women who struggle to love ourselves as we are!
Ana Degenaar says
My comment was not meant to offend you or anyone else on this conversation but it light of your comment I deleted it. I don’t take disorders lightly and I am actually very aware of them. Do not judge my view or sentiments on a sen tense alone. I meant to say that to those who commented on Justina’s pinterest board. Thank you.
keatime says
if you people watch you see that there is a huge variety in people. And the thing that strikes me is that NO ONE, not one single one of us is perfect. Others may not see it, but we all know there are things about each of us we don’t like. But it’s time to give up the nastiness about others and how they look. There are women who are skinny as could be, but unhealthy, there are women who are overweight and very healthy.
We just have to be nice to each other, as difficult as that is sometimes.
satsuki shibuya says
thank you for sharing your thoughts! i loved reading this post. i did see that pinterest discussion you mentioned here & was also saddened by the perception that people had towards women/beauty. i’ve been thinking about this lately also, not just about the human body, but the perceptions we have about everything, whether it be beauty, success, happiness and/or fulfillment. people will always have their opinions, but i think the most important point that you brought up here is that of awareness & acceptance. accepting that we are all different & that it’s the differences which make the world a beautiful & intriguing place to live. it’s the differences that enrich our lives, open our minds & help elevate us to a new level. it’s part of being human & i think people sometimes forget that we’re not robots. we’re not supposed to look the same, be the same, act the same. by pointing fingers, it brings division & friction into this world…. i can go on forever.
but what i do want to say is, thank you, for celebrating the beauty in being human & reminding us all of the importance of this simple & pure understanding.
chloé says
Your photo and open letter are beautiful Justina. As a follower of yours on Pinterest, I love the ‘Zany and Zaftig’ board you have curated but was shocked and fascinated by the sheer emotion cultivated from that pin of a gorgeous peacock-chair sitting woman. At a certain point, I had to stop reading. Some of the comments sounded like children – “fat people are lazy!”, some where insightful and many were just vile. I feel sorry for those who have such hatred in their hearts. Why do we teach children “people come in all shapes and sizes” but seem to toss the idea when we become adults? More than anything, the comments made me deeply sad. Sad that we are all so entrenched in a Photoshopped, weight loss/beauty industry, media driven ideal of what a woman “should” look like. That Adele can spur five bazillion articles trying to understand how she could be beautiful. That girls would rather be considered hot than smart, talented or creative. Sometimes I wonder if insecurity breeds contempt for something different. Or that body size is the last political correct avenue for cruelty (and people do get away with it). Kudos on standing up for what you believe in and being a voice of reason and intelligence. I sincerely hope you have a girl because more women need a mother who knows what beautiful truly means. Maybe then we can have a generation of women that understands not only the diversity of beauty but realizes their value/esteem extends far beyond the mirror. Let’s all focus on that?! I know I am trying to garner esteem much like you have so thank you for being a fabulous example. I’m rambling… Overall, you are so right – we are all working on bettering ourselves so let’s lift each other up in that quest rather than teared each other down.
Justina Blakeney says
“I sincerely hope you have a girl because more women need a mother who knows what beautiful truly means.” >>Thank you for this. I grew up with an amazingly strong and beautiful, curvy mom who taught me to love others and myself based on deeper things– I only hope to be able to pass on such strength and wisdom to my future children.
Anonymous says
You are a beautiful woman. I would love to have such clear lovely skin. Most women are NOT a size 2.
Will @ Bright.Bazaar says
You and I have on many occasions discussed the comments received on my fashion board and your zany-zaftig board, so you know my thoughts on much of the narrow-minded and short sighted view points left under images that we find inspiring and pin to OUR boards. Know that I admire you greatly and know, although having not met in person, that you are a beautiful and warm person with so much talent. Keep on keepin’ on, my friend. x
Justina Blakeney says
Thank you Will! It was time to do a blog post about this–because I couldn’t possibly reply to all of the comments and the photo it self. I’m so sick of the negative vibes!! So much love to you–
Jennifer Chong says
way to rock it girl, pinterest is filled with haters and yes the media has made it that people react so. but keep posting what you love and rocking what you have eventually people will see the beauty
Kate says
Pinterest commenters have become so hate-filled and awful I’m about ready to quit. I can’t even tell you how many photos of thin girls (not crazy thin, just thin) I see with “eat a f*cking sandwich, you are disgusting” comments I see, so apparently girls who do “eat a f*cking sandwich” also anger commenters. You can’t win. Pinterest was once a mood/inspiration board, but now it’s just another obnoxious social network filling up with comment trolls.
eslachtdermai says
I think you’re absolutely gorgeous, as is the model in the picture that you posted on Pinterest. I don’t understand why people can’t see beauty for what it is…not for what size you wear or how many bones you can see through a person’s skin. It is in so many forms. Your entry here is amazing too…so strong! Keep it up!
Elizabeth Pax says
Right on! I love your message. There are so many different beautiful bodies. I have noticed that pinterest and the THINSPIRATION obsession is really sad.
I’m a proud size 12, 160 lb Burlesque dancer. :D
(This photo is not safe for work)
http://a1.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/282058_260023860680746_199035106779622_1251580_3257315_n.jpg
(My main page is facebook.com/likepax)
Shannon Flaherty @ HUSTLE UP says
You’re the bomb, Tina! Great post that has inspired a great discussion here! XO, s
Chedva @Rooms and Words says
Way to go, Justina! Don’t let the haters get to you. At the end of the day, they have to live with themselves in their narrow-minded world, and that is just plain sad.
APeters says
You know something? I’m about your size. I looked at your photo and thought “what a beautiful body!” When I realized that that’s sort of what I look like, too, I was floored. Although I can easily appreciate your beauty, it’s hard to see my own…thanks for opening my eyes to that.
Anonymous says
Love what you’re doing! And yes, the woman in the chair is beautiful! and so are you. :)
Best of everything to you!
Anonymous says
I know you are trying to be diplomatic but if you really care about your readers opinion let them say what they want to say. you cannot post something like this and not expect to get controversial views. in fact that’s way yo do it.
Justina Blakeney says
Dear Anon,
I *have* let people say what they want to say–I have not deleted a single comment–and this is simply my response, as I too am entitled to my opinion. Also, I do not consider the image to be a all controversial–thought provoking perhaps–but not controversial.
Anonymous says
you are absolutely beautiful and such an inspiration, justina…. and you’re so right in saying that we all have to work on ourselves on some aspect or the other….. since when is being responsible, or loving, or kind, or just, less important than being a particular size?!! keep it going…. may the best of everything come to you.
OLD BRAND NEW says
You are one helluva inspiring lady. The (blog) world is so lucky to have a profound voice like yours. Preach on, sistuh, preach on.
The Waits says
AMEN AMEN AMEN!!!
girl, you have the right idea!
you are rockin your curves!!
i have been small, and i have been big.(ps, when im not feeling so sexy, i make sure not to let my children see my negativity! i want them to have a positive self image, and let them know everyone is beautiful, big or small/race/religion!)
I wish we could all love ourselves more..maybe if we did, we could love others better too!!
I applaud this post! thank you!
-m
Sara G says
Awesome post, Justina. You are an inspiration. By the way, you look absolutely GORGEOUS that photo is insane.
Amee says
When I first saw the pic, I was like, is that Justina??? Girl, you are HOT! No matter the size of the person, I’ve found that the way the person carries him/herself is what really catches my eye. And, girl, you are carryin’ it like no other. And what’s up with them cute-a$$ underpants?! Sorry for all the ‘hood love, but I really love posts like this. In my opinion, use of the internet can swing one of two (at least) ways: to conform to what’s already out there, or to open doors, risk a little (or a lot of) vulnerability to personal attacks and start a meaningful dialogue. It’s them movers n’ shakers that prove to have style I can really appreciate.
love’n’light,
Amee
Anonymous says
I just saw the link for this on pinterest and I’m glad I read this. You are stunning and I admire you. I am a 29 year old size 4/6 and feel so uncomfortable in my own skin because I’d rather be a size 2. My body was never a size 2 and nor is it meant to be. I obviously could eat better and work out more too, but what I am trying to come to terms with is being comfortable in my own skin and finding beauty in myself, at any size. I admire you and I honestly would love your self confidence. Keep up the great work!
Alice Brody says
I’ve struggled with my eating disorder all my life. I eat everything and anything no matter what my emotion. I’m a comfortable 10/12 right now and after having had 4 kids I think that’s pretty damn awesome. However, I am constantly thinking about being healthier….not thinner but healthier. You are absolutely gorgeous, as is the woman in the other photo. My immediate reaction to the photos on Pinterest was one of adoration. The second I saw the woman in the chair I not only repinned it but I created a new board entitled “Beauty”. My first thought was “beautiful”. Thank you for posting pictures of women with whom I can identify. You rock.
Nikki Hirigoyen says
That picture of you is absolutely stunning.
At the ripe old age of 24, i have just gotten to the point where i feel totally comfortable with my curves and with my body. to hell with what anyone else thinks. im healthier than i have ever been, i’m eating well and exercising often. and if that extra padding on my hips and thighs isnt coming off, that just means it was meant to be there!
Thank you for inspiring!!
Anne-Marie @ 10 Rooms says
Okay, i missed the sh*t storm,, but I’m so glad I didn’t miss this post. I’m shocked at the comments. As a Mum to two daughters, I try to help them enjoy healthy foods (and junk food, occasionally!), and to be sure our lives include lots of physical exercise – we walk, swim, ski and skate together regularly. It’s not about being skinny, it’s about balance, and taking care of yourself, in all the ways you’ve mentioned, not just physically. (and glad you left the comments, so we can see who all the messed up, rude people are)
paper and type says
thank you for being refreshingly real, open, & fearless. it’s quite something to see how you get ppl starting conversations..! i hope each & every person comes away learning something good.
i appreciate you sharing you!
xo
Jesyka @ Visual Vocabulary says
I saw that sh*t storm go down too, and I felt just about the same way as you. I’ve been on pinterest for a year and I’ve seen it degrade from what was once an internet haven to yet another source of frustration, annoyance, and disgust–almost entirely because of the proliferation of inane comments (in addition to the sort of dialogue that went down on this photo, if I have to see one more newbie rudely demand Joy Cho or sfgirlbybay to “delete” them, I’m going to explode!). I also sympathize with your feelings about deleting the comments. What do you do? Deleting them would probably ease your (and our!) pain from having to be reminded of the hateful, ignorant, and insensitive comments. But it is important to leave them standing to represent the truth. This happened. This is what people think. And it’s not okay. I just hope you don’t feel alone in your thoughts, because you have good company. :)
nichole (eat & be pretty) says
You could not have spoken any more truthfully. I think we all find ourselves getting caught up in the media’s idea of what “beauty” looks like- it’s so deeply engrained in our minds that it makes it nearly impossible to escape it (myself included). I have so much respect for you and all the other women who are able to openly love their body and expose it to the world, because most of us lack the courage to do so. We really need to all collaboratively have a more open mind about ourselves and others’ physical attributes or this issue will never go away. Thank you for taking a stand, you have my full respect and admiration.
Anonymous says
You. Are. Right. On. Wish more people had your insight.
Anonymous says
You know what sucks? It’s hard enough to love ourselves as we are, and then we’re constantly lambasted with what we should be!!! I love that line from “Eat, Pray, Love”(can’t remember the actual quote right now …) about how a man is never going to turn away a naked woman because she’s not perfect — he’s just happy to be getting some!!! It’s so not about how thin you are, it’s about how you love yourself! I’m trying my damndest to love ME, be confident in myself (no, not thin, not perfect) and it helps to see beautiful women like the woman in the peacock chair to make me feel like I’m ok — mother of seven, imperfect woman that I am! My husband loves me, thinks I’m sexy, has loved me for 22 years now. I’m trying to love me too.
Willow says
I think both photos are fabulous! In fact in the lower photo I was struck by a pang of jealousy at the absolute fabulousness of the models cheekbones and her gorgeous face. I am 5’9″, been prego twice and currently weigh 130lbs. I would never have been considered overweight in my life but have appreciated my various weight fluctuations throughout my pregnancies, the boobs were fantastic, and the only complaint I have ever had is that my cheeks fill out first. I have always been a bit jealous of the curvy girls with the amazing chiseled cheekbones. Just goes to show you there will always be someone out there who wants what you have:)
Emily says
Hell, I’m a size 4, and have *way* more cellulite than you! You look healthy, feminine and *amazing*. Rock it, lady! :)
Cake says
You are beautiful. I also wear a size 14 and when I first saw the pic above I admit I instantly thought, “oh great, another ‘not size 00’ being considered ‘curvy’ – yeah… right.” I often think if we could see ourselves through our friends’ or lover’s eyes we’d all think we kicked major ass. All my friends are beautiful. Every last one. And they are a range of sizes, backgrounds, experiences and races. It’s hard to love myself but with their support, and reminders like this one, I am working on it. Keep up the great work.
stephanie says
I think that your picture is gorgeous and I really admire your courage! I have been a thinner person my whole life and yet I have always had issues with my body. I wish I had the confidence that you have! It ‘s a shame that unhappy and insecure women tear each other down to build themselves up. The reason that I blog and pin is to be inspired by other strong and creative women, like you! Thank you for talking about issues that are real and important!
Anonymous says
My God woman, you take my breathe away. Lovely. Soft. Smooth. Beautiful.
Aireka Muse says
Justina, you continue to inspire me! Just by being your absolutely gorgeous self, you have helped me get over my own body issues multiple times. Your dedication to your work and steadfast commitment to what you believe in reminds me to stand tall and confident in all that I am. Once again, I am reminded how lucky I am to know such a rockstar of a woman. Amazing and damn right beautiful!!
Justina Blakeney says
Sweet Aireka, Thanks so much for this message. Confidence is key–I think you are just gorgeous (and RAD!!) can’t wait to see you this weekend. Muahh…
Lisa says
You rock! Thank you for helping us to see ourselves more clearly…in so many ways.
Anonymous says
The internet is a scary place. People are much more willing to say what they think then they would when face to face with someone they don’t know. I use the internet for so many things, but the more time I spend online, the more overstimulated I feel, and the sadder I get about the truth about how other people think. Are we all secret haters? Why do some people have the tact to refrain from commenting their thoughts and others don’t???
Leslie says
Hi – I found you through Pinterest. You are beautiful – I looked a lot like you when I was younger. I’m so happy that more people are beginning to realize that beauty is within and bones just ain’t pretty when they’re poking through skin. Women with curves have been considered beautiful throughout time (consider Rubens, Botticelli etc)and I just can’t understand the current fetish with the anorexic look. People should wise up. People should also be kinder to themselves and enjoy themselves the way god(dess) made them.
KiNG FLY says
You are beautiful and inspiring. Cheers to curves!!!!
Fiona says
It must be the week for revelations… I wrote about my mental illness on my blog after many years of being too scared to do so. Fortunately, I received nothing but kind words and support. I am appalled (and more than a bit shocked) that your photos and images illicited anything other than the same. Like most women I know, I struggle to accept the curves I have (and they are many!) but applaud anyone’s attempt to help us love ourselves more. Please keep doing what you are doing – acceptance of mental illness is my issue, but you highlight something even more prevalent in our society and I, for one, just want to give you a big hug for doing so with such grace and style :-)
Shauna Nep says
Proud to call you my friend. You are an inspiration.
Oh and that photo? Are you kidding me? So stunning.
niki d. says
excellent post!
nina munk says
Pretty, witty, wise darling. Tu es sublime. …
virginia says
First of all, you look ravishing in the top picture and the bottom photo is supremely inspiring. I have curves – even at my thinnest – and i LOVE them! yes, i often have a hard time finding pants that fit but I would never give up my round bottom for a pair of skinny jeans. it’s who I am.
your post also made me realize why I’ve become bored with fashion blogs – there is very little representing gorgeous women of all shapes and sizes. Your confidence is inspiring!
Carla says
I’m going to offer a dissenting opinion on the negative comments–delete them. I don’t look at Pinterest, but this negativity about bodies–particularly women’s bodies–is everywhere on the Internet, and by removing them you might also change the dialogue by leaving up only positive comments about the bodies you “pin.” Just a thought; there’s really no right or wrong way to handle it, but it introduces the potential for your Pinterest site to create–and reinforce–a different dialogue entirely.
Justina Blakeney says
Carla, i hear you– and thank you so much for sharing your dissenting opinion. I really do appreciate it.
nicole valentine don says
you are beautiful!!!!! that photo of you is just…’wow’. i aim to be more proud of my body now too. thank you :)
Anonymous says
wow! just wow! thank you for posting that…
Robin Jean says
Thank you. You are beautiful, this woman is beautiful. There is nothing more beautiful than the sight of a woman enjoying herself. Thank you for representing diversity. I’m sorry you had to read those comments, there is a lot of ugliness out there don’t let it trouble you. Keep doing what is important to you. xo
kelly cuadra says
such a beautiful & truthful soul you are.
Anonymous says
I think that we really are all told that we are not good enough from the get go as we are raised in this world, and it takes so much to break out of that mind set. Thank you so much for being so brave and strong. You have helped this girl love herself a little bit more today!
Anna says
AMEN.
Anonymous says
I just came across your post on pinterest and I have to say – you are awesome. Beautiful from the outside in.
Anonymous says
I don’t know how to thank you for this post. I found it on pintrest. I’ve been struggling so much with weight and how i look. Most people out there just slam bigger women or say to get over it and just like yourself when so much more goes into it. Thank you
Anonymous says
Perhaps the “haters” who left such insensitive comments on your photo of the beautiful lady in the chair, should spend a little more time working on their hearts and less time working on their bodies!
The littlest says
Justina, you are the REAL DEAL. a gorgeous, sensitive, creative and kind person. i would say you are a complete package but you are right, there is so much more growing to do. we ALL need to do the work. mind, body, soul.
Justina Blakeney says
it may be the pregnancy hormones but reading your comment just made me tear up. :P So much love to you….
Stephe says
Pretty great J.
Thx for posting
Lea says
I only discovered your online existence hours ago. Having clicked through your corner, this post is what truly beckoned me. Wow. How sad it is that there is a “they” that controls how we view our physical selves. I wonder if their statements would have been expressed if the computer did not offer them the censorship shield.
Despite the brief encounter with you, you seem to be a confident, creative, wonderfully dressed woman. I know your children will benefit from having such a great role model; aspire to make the societal change with the little people that aspire to be you!
Julie says
Gorgeous photo on top!
mary @ B&G JOURNALS says
thank you so much for writing this and reminding us that the power of “normativity” is so incredibly damaging and we must be on guard that we don’t become zombies of the media that regurgitate simple what they tell us “beautiful” is but to celebrate the range of true beauty that exists in all its manifestations, not just that deemed so by pop culture. thank you for your gutsy post of your own photo, beautiful and brave :)
Beyle says
I think you are a beautiful and WISE woman, and I applaud your decision to leave up all the comments you received, whether positive, negative, or utterly offensive. I didn’t read the posts I found to be rude or ignorant, but I prefer to at least be conscious of the fact that some people in the world–hopefully a small, albeit it vocal, minority–just don’t see things the way I do. Ignorance may be bliss for some, but when ugliness and cruelty are hidden away and not discussed, they tend to fester, and ultimately more people wind up suffering. At least that’s how it seems to me. I can only hope that by loving yourself and sharing your confidence with the rest of us, more “zany and zaftig” women will be empowered to do the same. Thank you!!
Becky Trekas says
The photos are very Beautiful. And I love to see photos of Real Women with Real Beauty on Pinterest. I hope to see more of this in the future. Thank you for being Real and Beautiful. Love your Blog!
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